Service Industry Ninjas

 Last night we had an indulgent and delectable Indian meal at Kama Sutra to celebrate Dad's 65th birthday. We often go to this establishment for special occasions, and in 6 years, it has never disappointed. Our server last night was Tobias. He is truly extraordinary and I am convinced that he is, in fact, a ninja.

 from Wikipedia: A ninja (忍者^?) or shinobi (忍び^?) was a covert agent or mercenary of feudal Japan specializing in unorthodox arts of war. The functions of the ninja included espionage, sabotage, infiltration, and assassination, as well as open combat in certain situations.

A service industry ninja, like their military cousin, operates with stealth, quickness and deadly precision. Imagine, if you will, you are sitting, relaxed, at a restaurant, in flickering candlelight. You turn slightly in your seat to adjust your jacket on the back of your chair. When you look back up, your waiter-ninja has suddenly appeared in front of you. You swallow a surprised gasp. Before you are even aware it has happened he has already taken your drink order and vanished (fyi: you ordered the Sauvignon Blanc recommended to you by your waiter-ninja. You don't know it yet, but this crisp, dry white wine will pair perfectly with the dish you order in approximately 10 minutes. Waiter-ninja has already used his psychic powers to anticipate your dinner order.)

And so it goes...This is the magic of ninja-waiters. You check a text message. You look back up, your wine glass is miraculously full again. Is this a Harry Potter charm?? No! You've just been waiter-ninjaed! Your waiter-ninja will anticipate your every need and want. The exact moment you are ready to eat, your meal will arrive, all together, at the appropriate temperatures and beautifully arranged. Condiments will appear on the table the second you think, "oh this would taste great with a little..." Your plate will disappear from under your nose as soon as you slide your knife and fork into a parallel position. And then, after the offer of dessert and coffee, your bill for the evening will apparate onto the table just as you begin to think it is time to head out. AMAZING!

Ninja-waiters are a rare and fascinating breed that have received next to no real attention from the academic world. Where do these ninjas come from, where do they train? And what would we ever do if the ninja-waiters of the world decided to use their impressive skills for evil? How did a 30-something white male come to be employed as a ninja-waiter at an Indian restaurant? These are pressing questions which I believe need to be asked.